The Swifties Guide to Super Bowl LVIII

With the Super Bowl getting closer, one of the biggest storylines is not about the teams or the players, but about Taylor Swift and her presence at the games. Some people hate seeing her there — namely conservatives — and think she is ruining football, while others are watching football for the first time, simply just to catch a glimpse of the pop sensation.

Either way, let’s try to have some fun with this silliness. This is for my Swifties out there. Now, I am not a full-blown follower, more of a Swiftie by association. But I like her music, and I tried (to no avail) to get tickets to the Eras Tour. She made up a big part of my childhood and connected me to my family and friends. So let’s get together and celebrate the person we are really cheering for this year in Vegas — Swift’s pilot flying her from Japan so she gets to the game on time, and a really important football game being played on Sunday. (The environment, be damned!)

Here is your Swiftie guide to watching the Super Bowl.

Firstly, I want to start by saying that you are fully allowed to watch this game and start to fall in love with football, even if your love and excitement were brought on because Taylor is at the games. Football is a great sport with a rich history and a ton of exciting players and teams — even if the league and team owners are usually just terrible on off-the-field issues. You can have your own Eras Tour moment if you would like to research stuff about the teams in the league, and see what they have done in their separate moments. You can even pick your favorite, just like your favorite album, but the names are decided by decades usually and not by things like birth year or color.

Who are our James, Betty, and Augustine?

On Swift’s album folklore, there are characters that she has created and written about in songs who are in a love triangle. They are James, Betty, and Augustine. What has more conflict and arguably, more entertainment, than a love triangle? When the album dropped, she wrote, “One thing I did purposely on this album was put the Easter eggs in the lyrics, more than just the videos. I created character arcs and recurring themes that map out who is singing about who.”

James, in Swift’s universe, is a teenager who has cheated on his girlfriend, Betty. He is trying to win her back, as he sings the song “betty” as a way to apologize because she was the love of his life.

The Chiefs are our James. They have never cheated in real life, and they won the Super Bowl last year. They need to prove that they really truly want their Betty back for a second year in a row, and they are going to do whatever is necessary.

Betty is James’ former girlfriend, who he cheats on. Our Betty is, of course, the Lombardi Trophy. Swift wrote the song “cardigan” from her perspective. In the song, Betty says to James:

“I knew you’d miss me once the thrill expired

And you’d be standin’ in my front porch light

And I knew you’d come back to me”

Every year, two teams fight throughout the season to see who will make it to the Super Bowl. They always come back for it. It’s like the trophy knows that they will always come back, no matter what. Maybe because a team will always have to be crowned a winner, but maybe it is because they truly love it.

Now, onto Augustine. In the lore she is the girl James is cheating with, she is the other woman in the picture. Her song is “august” and while Swift says the perspective is of her after James has gone back to Betty, for our sake and for our understanding, let’s assume that we don’t know that Betty and James will get back together, since we don’t yet know the outcome of the Super Bowl. Perhaps in this world, James chooses Augustine.

Augustine is the 49ers. Swift says that Augustine is a girl who doesn’t want James to know she cares, but she does. The 49ers don’t want you to know that they lost four years ago to the same team, they aren’t the same team they were then. But they care. They know how it feels to come so close and lose. They care about how Sunday will go, because it decides what way our love triangle ends up.

What Era is Each Team in?

Swift has 10 eras (soon to be 11 with her new album announcement!) that each had their time in the sun and a section of her tour (except for her debut album). Each era is unique and has its own characteristics, similar to the two NFL teams that will play for a title.

The 49ers are for sure in their Reputation era. They are on the hunt for redemption. Many people have counted them out since their last trip to the big game, and they have proven almost everyone wrong. The final nail in the coffin is winning the Super Bowl with Brock Purdy at the helm (we will talk about Mr. Irrelevant a bit more later.)

The Chiefs era is harder to determine. I would argue that because of their success and how much fun it looks like they have every day, they could be in 1989, but they also might be Speak Now, an era full of magic, and what sums up magic better than a chance at going back-to-back? Maybe it’s Red, not only because of the color, but because Patrick Mahomes is getting older, and maturing as a QB. I think the best answer though is Midnights. It’s a little out there, a little weird, a completely different style than anything we have ever seen from Swift, but also incredibly successful. It was the most streamed album on Spotify in a single day. It just won the Grammy for Album of the Year. The Chiefs are a completely different team than last year, and not many thought they would make it back to the Super Bowl, but here they are, being incredibly successful. It is an insane run.

A Song for Key Players

If you don’t quite understand who everyone is who will be on the field on Sunday, these are the names that you definitely should be aware of. To help make the connection, here are some songs by Taylor that can maybe paint a picture of who they are and why they are important.

Travis Kelce, Kansas City tight end: “You Belong With Me (Taylor’s Version)”

This is the obvious choice, as he’s Taylor’s boyfriend.

George Kittle, San Francisco tight end: “I Knew You Were Trouble (Taylor’s Version)”

Kittle is one of the guys who will cause a lot of trouble if the Chiefs defense doesn’t keep an eye on him. He is also really good at blocking. When you see the 85 line up, get ready for some chaos (good or bad, depending on who you are rooting for).

Patrick Mahomes, Kansas City QB: “Anti-Hero”

Not only is it one of his favorite songs by Swift, but many would agree that he is the problem (in a good way), as he is one of the reasons that the Chiefs are so good.

Brock Purdy, San Francisco QB: “You Need To Calm Down”

It would have been too easy to give him “Mr. Perfectly Fine,” so let’s go with this track instead from Lover. Part of being an elite QB is being calm under pressure. If things ever get a little crazy, Purdy and his teammates will just have to remember to chill.

Isiah Pacheco, Kansas City running back, and Christian McCaffery, San Francisco running back: “Getaway Car”

Getaway cars have to be fast, and running backs are usually the fastest players on the team.

Deebo Samuel, San Francisco wide receiver: “Shake It Off (Taylor’s Version)”

Samuel is one of the best at shaking off tackles to get some extra yards.

With the Super Bowl only days away, hopefully, this guide helps you or the Swifties in your life understand a little bit more about the game, and what is at stake. You, just like Taylor, have officially entered your watching football era, and are taking the journey together. So, enjoy some snacks, have a glass of white wine, wear your Eras Tour shirt, and watch the game Fearless(ly) (Taylor’s Version).